How do you as a manager deal with them? As a manager, at least a good manager, you have to be able to see, hear and help. How do you set this up for your people?

• You need to develop an open, trusting environment. People have to have the ability to speak freely. With no fear of reprimand. Start with the individuals on the team first, then make sure you take it to the complete team. Start small, then go big.
• Know you people. Think of the fear emotions… Some folks can deal with it themselves, they “fear” they may fail and they buckle down and do whatever is necessary. Others may shutdown. Recognize what works for each person and get to moving forward quickly.
• Push through the uncomfortable. Sometimes dealing with emotions can be uncomfortable. It happens. You as the manager need to make sure that you deal with the situation as early as possible to lessen the effect long term. Role play that discuss with a mentor, be honest and push through – you will be surprised at the end of it.
• Be real and yourself. Slow down.. The first thing that most people do is react. Slow down and think it through first. I know this is a broken record when it comes to be a manager. You have to set the example for your team. All eyes are watching you all the time. Make sure that you are being real. If you are having one of those days (like your folks), acknowledge it with them. Maybe they will have some insight for you! Last time I checked, you managers are people too.
• Ask others if they are feeling the same way. When in the team setting, go ahead and ask for additional information. Some folks are more vocal than others and sometimes we think it is just them. If you ask, you maybe surprised to see that more folks are in the same boat. Just afraid to speak up first. Once on the table, it can be worked.

Don’t think that emotions are not going to play in your teams. Be ready, be prepared and don’t be afraid. The sooner you confront, acknowledge and validate, the quicker moving forward can happen. All negative emotions can true to a positive, if handled properly. Same is true for positive emotions (passion). If you play that one up too much on your “rising star” – the rest of the team will be deflated or be negative toward that person. This is a very tricky subject, probably why that VP wanted nothing to do with it. You have to deal with it…

Here are those that want to leave 2011:

10. Transparency… What is that really? If you were trying to figure it out, you would have to be like a spelling bee contestant. “Can I have that in a sentence please?”

9. Thinking Outside the Box… I know this one has been around for quite sometime, it is definitely time to hang that one out to dry.

8. Drill Down… This is for the folks that don’t understand the concept at a higher level. Hence you have to drill down for them to understand. Well, as the manager this truly makes you look pretty dumb (at least to your folks).

7. Reaching Out… The only thing that should reach out is a baby asking to be picked up or hugged. Otherwise, just say, “Get in contact with xxxx.”

6. Thought Leadership… Let’s not make up terms that just dummy down their overall intent. This one comes across as an oxymoron, just like military intelligence. Sorry – stop it!

5. Boil the Ocean… Why would you think about boiling the ocean? I think we all understand that the task at hand is going to be difficult – or maybe not (just say – “this is going to be difficult.”)

4. Going Green… This is one that is fashionable and we all want to seem hip and cool. After the first time, this gets very old.

3. Internalize… Another one of those that I am sure have been around for a couple of years. Are you asking me to think about it some more? If so, then say that.

2. Let’s ask out stakeholders community… Maybe it is me, but I have already discussed with those folks in the know and what I am saying is with their comments in mind. Should be part of all discussions that information is gathered before a recommendation is come up. Once a recommendation is ready, no need to ask the stakeholders again. Sorry, waste of time. Or maybe you really don’t trust your folks.. Whichever – stop!

1. Drink the Kool-aid, Eat Our Own Dog Food… Or anything else that just means we have to try it before we ask others too. So sick of these…

Have any that drive you nuts?

From the personal side:

• The hip replacement has gone as planned. Everything is healing as expected. The physical therapist is happy with the progress. It is looking like I should be able to get back in the gym within a week or two. Just in time for me to work on getting some of the weight off, from sitting around during the holidays.
• Thanksgiving and Hanukah went well. Getting together with family and friends is something special every time we do it. Watching the grand daughter’s open up their presents is always a delight. Those faces light up!
• Holiday and birthday parties. Our house was used for Haley Elementary staff holiday party! The weather sucked that day, by Arizona standards. It was rainy and cold, which took the party to the inside. There were 69 or so folks at this one. My wife did an amazing job! The other party was for my grand daughter, Melia, she turned 3. My daughter decided to use our backyard for their party. Both were awesome events.
• We are in the middle of some projects at home. House painting (inside) is underway. Since I am not able to really do the painting, I am having some amazing people do the painting. They are doing a very nice job (and they are extremely clean about it).

From my other activities:

• I continue to take care of the Haley Elementary Facebook page. We are starting to really see some traction from the parents and teachers on using this for events. The calendar is working out great. We continue to add photos as well. The other day, one of the local newspapers started to share our information out.
• We are in the last couple of days left in 2011 and Az4Education is busy working on getting the last bit of charitable donations by the end of the year. So, if you are in Arizona and what to help a student out – check us out!
• I continue to look for my “second” career. With the end of the year, I am starting to notice more jobs opening up. Some of them have definitely caught my attention. Submitted a few job applications to those. We will see what happens.
• Got together with some of my old co-workers. I definitely enjoy meeting up and catching up with those people. They are great friends. We talked about everything under the sun. Some of the topics were No Pants, good times, plans for the future, help needed and just general BS. It was all good stuff.

From the Blog side:

• I am working on changing the theme. It is time. I have narrowed my choices down. I am deciding between the Thesis or Genesis Themes. Anyone have a preference? Remember, I am a novice at making changes…

Keep the focus on the simply on the problem. Of course, that means that you and the team need to spend sometime truly identifying the problem. Clearly and concisely as possible. Identify the gap on what is happening and what should be happening. Define that desired state! First step in collaborative here is getting agreement on the problem. Once agreed upon, write it down – keep it visible.

Problem must matter! Above you got agreement on the problem, that is a powerful first step. Getting the team to really focus on what the expected outcome will be and how great it will be for them will add a layer of frosting on the teams cake. Some of the team may agree on the problem and just go about doing the same old stuff (status quo), but keep the focused on the why and benefits will keep them from the status quo.

Let team discuss concerns and potential barriers. Giving the team an opportunity to put forth all of the concerns (some of that will be their personal agenda) and desired outcomes gives everyone a clear view. So, create that safe environment to get people talking.  If everyone was just to let the team lead do everything from identifying the problem, why and desired outcome – nothing will change. Get everyone involved, actively involved.

Get everyone on board. I know this seems like just me summarizing what was above. Think about it awhile… If you are the leader of the team, this area is going to be the toughest for you. Your team may say that they are on board. They may even give it a try. Actions speak! Watch closely for individuals that a still posturing or holding out for their solution. Be ready to act on your part quickly. Remember this is the whole team.

Over the years, I have seen better results when I apply the above. Is it completely successful? Not really. Collaborative problem solving is difficult and requires time and effort. When collaborative problem solving is done right, it is a very powerful tool. It also, demonstrates to the complete team that they are a high performing team…

Today was an outstanding day for it. At the local Starbucks there were lines both in the drive thru and inside. I just sat and watch the interaction around me. Since the lines were not going down (more people just kept coming in), I went to a different area of the shopping center, Basha Grocery. Another place that was pretty full in the sitting area. I pulled up a spot on the counter and observed there. What I was watching was the different generations and how they go about their morning routine.

Inside Starbucks, they were pretty full with generation X and Y folks. A few boomers were in the house, but very few. Watching the folks interact definitely demonstrates the difference within the generation. Most of the X’ers were busy discussing with each other how long the lines were, how much they were looking forward to Thanksgiving and how bad the economy and the political leadership was doing. There were a few of them busy working away on their laptops. I noticed email mostly.  The Y’s were busy too, they did not share many words with anyone. They were busy using their smart phones to stay on top of things. In fact, one mother said to her daughter, “will you put that thing down, all you ever do is use that thing 24×7.” The reply back was pretty good, “well, you are communicating with your friends and so am I – they are just not here.”

When I was in Basha’s, the crowd was definitely different. The folks that hang out there in the morning are mostly baby boomers. They were drinking their Starbucks and having donuts. They spent most of their time talking with whoever passed by. Many of them were sitting by themselves and were just reading the paper or sitting in silence until someone walked by. It was definitely a gathering place for them. Their conversations were centered on health, family and worries about social security.

When you are out and about, take some time to just observe people. Look at the difference of folks, like age, and how they interact differently. This will help you interact better with them. When I was in Basha’s, I said hello a lot. I needed to be prepared to have discussions with folks that I just did not know. We talked about everything and anything. In Starbucks, it was bit different. For most of the folks, they just looked at me and moved on with their morning routine. For the some of the Y’s, they would see my laptop and smart phone, and would stop to say hi. I just needed to have some of their “toys” to seem to fit in.

Communicating with the different generations is sometimes difficult. When I was with the boomers (my peeps), they settled to hear a bit but their stories were really good. The generation X folks, they were the one group that did not open up. They pretty much kept to themselves. For the generation Y folks, they opened up pretty easy (once they saw my toys) and we had some really good technology discussions. They focused on what I use, what they use and were open to trying new things. Overall, it was a great morning!