Trust – Are Your Behaviors Damaging It?

I have twice attended my companies, Building Trust Workshop. Twice you wonder – why?  The first time was with my manager and her staff. We did this as a team activity! The second time, it was with the at the mother organizations Staff -1 face to face – last year. Same material… So, I have taken this with a lot of folks… The overall value of the class to me – was worth the time spent. I truly am a people person and feel that trust is key to any successful relationship.

This post is more on sharing some of the top 25 behaviors that were posted over at Management-issues. Some have happened to me, around me and I hope that I have not done some of them (but, I may have – not intentionally but when it happens it happens).

1. You fail to keep your promises, agreements and commitments.
2. You serve your self first and others only when it is convenient.
3. You micromanage and resist delegating.
4. You demonstrate an inconsistency between what you say and how you behave.
5. You fail to share critical information with your colleagues.
6. You choose to not tell the truth.
7. You resort to blaming and scapegoating others rather than own your mistakes.
8. You judge and criticize rather than offer constructive feedback.
9. You betray confidences, gossip and talk about others behind their backs.
10. You choose to not allow others to contribute or make decisions.
11. You downplay others’ talents, knowledge and skills.
12. You refuse to support others with their professional development.
13. You resist creating shared values, expectations and intentions in favor of your own agenda; you refuse to compromise and foster win-lose arguments.
14. You refuse to be held accountable by your colleagues.
15. You resist discussing your personal life, allowing your vulnerability, disclosing your weaknesses and admitting your relationship challenges.
16. You rationalize sarcasm, put-down humor and off-putting remarks as “good for the group”.
17. You fail to admit you need support and don’t ask colleagues for help.
18. You take others’ suggestions and critiques as personal attacks.
19. You fail to speak up in team meetings and avoid contributing constructively.
20. You refuse to consider the idea of constructive conflict and avoid conflict at all cost.
21. You consistently hijack team meetings and move them off topic.
22. You refuse to follow through on decisions agreed upon at team meetings.
23. You secretly engage in back-door negotiations with other team members to create your own alliances.
24. You refuse to give others the benefit of the doubt and prefer to judge them without asking them to explain their position or actions.
25. You refuse to apologize for mistakes, misunderstandings and inappropriate behavior and dig your heels in to defend yourself and protect your reputation.

When you were reading this list – did you start to think of individuals that came to mind? Did you see some people that have multiple behaviors? I know I did… I could not help it. This is a very long and definitely possible for one of more of these items to pop up from time to time. Some folks, had a one time slip in my mind. Others – well, they live these behaviors and validate them over and over again. For me, those folks have definitely lost a lot of trust (not completely). Can trust be earned back? Yes but slowly.

Most companies intentions for having Building Trust Workshop are around that we work in a team environment. Trust is a very key function of successful teams. In the times that we are facing today, we have to stand up with our integrity in tact.